The Wall Street Journal is out with one of the those eye-opening stories that defies common moral sense. It seems that Jason Ceyanes, the 35-year-old superintendent of schools in Argyle, Texas, decided to crack down on sexually-suggestive dancing at the local high school. But, when the superintendent banned "freak dancing," he got into trouble with some of Argyle's parents.
Here is how The Wall Street Journal introduced its account of the controversy:
A new resolve by school officials in this booming Dallas suburb to crack down on sexually suggestive dancing -- and skimpy clothing -- has sparked a rancorous debate over what boundaries should be set for teenagers' self-expression. Argyle joins a long list of other schools around the country that have banned the hip-hop inspired dancing known as "grinding" or "freak dancing."
But in Argyle, a once-sleepy farming community strained by explosive growth from an influx of well-to-do suburbanites, the controversy has gotten vicious. Some parents blame the newly installed school superintendent, Jason Ceyanes, 35, for ruining their children's October homecoming dance by enforcing a strict dress code and making provocative dancing off-limits. Disgusted, a lot of kids left, and the dance ended early.
Mr. Ceyanes says he fears current cleavage-baring dress styles combined with sexually charged dancing could lead to an unsafe environment for students.
"This is not just shaking your booty," he said. "This is pelvis-to-pelvis physical contact in the private areas...and then moving around."
"Freak dancing" is well known throughout the nation, and it involves what can only be described as "sexually charged" physical contact and movement. But many of the kids in Argyle were "disgusted" that freak dancing was banned at the homecoming dance, so they left. That might be fairly easy to understand. After all, adolescents are expected to exhibit adolescent patterns of misbehavior. What makes this story so interesting is that so many parents responded by joining their adolescents in immature response. In fact, their protest of the superintendent's policy is shocking.
As the paper explained, "Many parents support Mr. Ceyanes's actions. But another vocal faction has been harshly critical of the new superintendent, creating a deep rift in the community. These parents defend the children of Argyle as 'good kids,' and say they should be trusted to dance and dress the way they want."
Here is one of the moral hallmarks of our confused age. Parents defy authority and propriety and justify the misbehavior of their own children while calling them "good kids." In this case, they argue that these "good kids" should be allowed "to dance and dress the way they want" -- even if that means sexually suggestive dress and sexually charged dancing.
Mr. Ceyanes held a public meeting for parents and played a video of freak dancing. "I cannot imagine that there is a father in this room who could watch this video and be all right with a young man dancing with his daughter in that fashion," he told the parents.
This is further evidence of a trend long in coming. Fashion styles for adult women now mimic those of adolescent girls. Why? So many moms want to act like teenagers and dress as provocatively as their offspring. Far too many parents want to act like their teenagers' friends and peers, not like parents. Parents, after all, are expected to act like adults, and this is a society that depreciates adulthood and valorizes adolescence.
When a story like this makes the front page of The Wall Street Journal, something significant has shifted on the moral landscape. When parents demand that their "good kids" be allowed to freak dance at school events, the real story shifts from the kids to the parents.
The Wall Street Journal also features this video coverage of the story [go here].
Here is how The Wall Street Journal introduced its account of the controversy:
A new resolve by school officials in this booming Dallas suburb to crack down on sexually suggestive dancing -- and skimpy clothing -- has sparked a rancorous debate over what boundaries should be set for teenagers' self-expression. Argyle joins a long list of other schools around the country that have banned the hip-hop inspired dancing known as "grinding" or "freak dancing."
But in Argyle, a once-sleepy farming community strained by explosive growth from an influx of well-to-do suburbanites, the controversy has gotten vicious. Some parents blame the newly installed school superintendent, Jason Ceyanes, 35, for ruining their children's October homecoming dance by enforcing a strict dress code and making provocative dancing off-limits. Disgusted, a lot of kids left, and the dance ended early.
Mr. Ceyanes says he fears current cleavage-baring dress styles combined with sexually charged dancing could lead to an unsafe environment for students.
"This is not just shaking your booty," he said. "This is pelvis-to-pelvis physical contact in the private areas...and then moving around."
"Freak dancing" is well known throughout the nation, and it involves what can only be described as "sexually charged" physical contact and movement. But many of the kids in Argyle were "disgusted" that freak dancing was banned at the homecoming dance, so they left. That might be fairly easy to understand. After all, adolescents are expected to exhibit adolescent patterns of misbehavior. What makes this story so interesting is that so many parents responded by joining their adolescents in immature response. In fact, their protest of the superintendent's policy is shocking.
As the paper explained, "Many parents support Mr. Ceyanes's actions. But another vocal faction has been harshly critical of the new superintendent, creating a deep rift in the community. These parents defend the children of Argyle as 'good kids,' and say they should be trusted to dance and dress the way they want."
Here is one of the moral hallmarks of our confused age. Parents defy authority and propriety and justify the misbehavior of their own children while calling them "good kids." In this case, they argue that these "good kids" should be allowed "to dance and dress the way they want" -- even if that means sexually suggestive dress and sexually charged dancing.
Mr. Ceyanes held a public meeting for parents and played a video of freak dancing. "I cannot imagine that there is a father in this room who could watch this video and be all right with a young man dancing with his daughter in that fashion," he told the parents.
This is further evidence of a trend long in coming. Fashion styles for adult women now mimic those of adolescent girls. Why? So many moms want to act like teenagers and dress as provocatively as their offspring. Far too many parents want to act like their teenagers' friends and peers, not like parents. Parents, after all, are expected to act like adults, and this is a society that depreciates adulthood and valorizes adolescence.
When a story like this makes the front page of The Wall Street Journal, something significant has shifted on the moral landscape. When parents demand that their "good kids" be allowed to freak dance at school events, the real story shifts from the kids to the parents.
The Wall Street Journal also features this video coverage of the story [go here].
4 comments:
I hope the superintendent sticks to his guns. I did send an email to the author of the story. Here is what I told her:
"I have two daughters and a son. The girls are 13 and 21. The 21 year old graduated from St. Joseph Academy in Cleveland in 2004. The younger daughter is a freshman at the Academy. The 21 year old attended many dances and functions while a student and the 13 year old has attended "mixers" and did attend homecoming in October.
Most of the mixers are jeans and t-shirt type things. The homecoming dance, winter formal and prom (for seniors only) are dressier affairs. The kids know going in that the following rules will apply:
1. No one gets admitted after 8:30 (although exceptions are made for when a sports team/musical group, etc., have a competition or event . . . i.e., this Friday is the Fall Mixer and the swim team has a meet and will not be back to the school until 9:00).
2. No student can leave until 10:30. If there is an emergency, a parent will be contacted. No exceptions.
3. If a student has to go to their vehicle during the event, they will be accompanied by a parent chaperone AND a teacher or one of the police officers on duty.
4. Appropriate clothing is required, including the fact that the students are not allowed to wear "dress" shoes on the gym floor. Slippers, flip-flops, tennis shoes, etc., are fine.
5. All music is pre-approved. ALL MUSIC. The way to manage this is the contract signed with the DJ. If they try to "slip one by" that is not on the pre-approved list, they don't get paid the balance owed for the evening (a deposit is always paid but the balance owed is enough to make it painful enough that a DJ won't do it). Besides, they also want to come back.
6. For the formal dances (homecoming/winter formal/prom), a permission slip must be signed by not only the parents of the student but any students from other schools attending must have the permission slip signed by their parent and an administrator from their school. All of the permission slips must be turned in four days before the dance. They do keep a list of whose been naughty and students and/or dates have been banned from other functions. When my 21 year old was a senior, one of her classmates came to homecoming after having enjoyed a couple of drinks. She was not only not allowed to attend any of the other dances that year (including prom), but, from what I was told, her date tried to go to the winter formal with another student and discovered that he was banned also.
7. Student ids are required for admittance.
8. Any of the chaperones are allowed to step between dancers or interrupt any inappropriate dancing. One assistance principal's favorite "thing" is walking up to the girl and asking if she "would dance with your father like that?" It generally stops the lewd dancing.
9. Mixers are restricted to the student body and invitees from the two local all boys' schools. The boys schools do the same thing but restrict the invitees to their own school and the two local all girls' schools.
As a parent, it is a beautiful thing. As to the parent that was upset that her daughter left the dance after such a short time, I say, shame on you. It would be the last dance my daughter would go to. Not because the dance was a "bust" but because I am sure it wasn't just the cost of the dress, but the shoes, hair, make-up, pre-event dinner, etc. If my daughter could not have a good time with her friends, she would not be doing much of anything for a very long time.
Currently, the discussion that my 13 year and I are having is over the fact that she wants to wear a slinky black dress to winter formal. My response is that I am sure it will look lovely over a turtle neck and that since she is only 13 (and yes, she is very bright, all honors classes and did skip a year of school), she is too young to wear black. Period. The advantage I have is that it is my money. For now, I am the queen."
Many of these same parents will wonder why there are so many teen age pregnancies and so many STDs. The dancing is not what causes these problems. It is that the parents have subrogated control of their children to their children. And then, they both get upset when another adult says "enough."
Your article is excellent and would be appropriate if it weren't based on a series of misrepresentations. I live in Argyle and am intimately connected with this issue, having two daughters attending Argyle High School. I'm afraid that the Wall Street Journal got it wrong, mostly because they listened to the charming but self-serving Mr. Ceyanes.
Here is the truth of what happened in Argyle.
The school has a dress code that was designed for the classroom. It includes things like no baring of upper back, straps on dresses must be at least 3" wide, etc. It's obvious to anyone that such a dress code is inappropriate when applied to a social situation like a homecoming dance, but when the half-hearted effort to come up with a more appropriate social dress code didn't reach consensus in time, that is exactly what Mr. Ceyanes did.
There were a number of student who were rejected at the door for having dresses with 1" shoulder straps, or open backs down to the (gasp!) shoulder blades. These aren't dresses that are showing cleavage or upper thigh either.
Needless to say, the number of homecoming dance dresses that met the standard of being appropriate for the classroom as well was pretty small, and so the dance pretty much fell apart as you would expect, and many students and parents were pretty angry about it.
This is where the true deception takes place. Realizing that many in the community were angry over his failure to provide an appropriate dress code for a social occasion like a dance, Mr. Ceyanes proceeded to pretend that the parents who were angry at him were angry because he had forbidden "freak dancing".
Make no mistake; although the video shown was from the internet and was far worse than anything that took place at the school dance, there was some freak dancing that took place that evening. Mr. Ceyanes was quite correct in forbidding it. The lie is that he told the Wall Street Journal that the parents were angry at him because he interfered with the dancing.
I live in Argyle, and as a parent with children in this High School I have spoken with many other parents on this issue. THERE IS NOT A SINGLE PARENT WHO FELT MR. CEYANES WAS WRONG TO FORBID FREAK DANCING. Not one.
The entirety of the complaints against Mr. Ceyanes are that he failed to come up with an appropriate dress code for the dance and through sheer laziness chose to enforce a totally inappropriate classroom dress code instead at a social event. By doing so he ruined an event that a large number of students had truly looked forward to.
Don't be fooled; not a single parent in Argyle advocates freak dancing or anything like it. That is a lie told by Mr. Ceyanes, slandering a good community to cover his own screw up, and sadly it was repeated by the Wall Street Journal.
Feel free to contact me if you have any further questions regarding this issue.
Kevin Wade
kwade79@gmail.com
Update...
1. The Argyle school board has declined to renew Mr. Ceyanes' contract as superintendent of schools, because he chose to embarrass the community on a national level rather than admit his error with the dress code and make amends.
2. Argyle School District now has a social event dress code appropriate to social situations that is separate from the daytime classroom dress code. This code was initated by students and negotiated between student representatives and the principal of the high school.
3. "Freak dancing" is STILL FORBIDDEN AT ARGYLE SCHOOLS. No parent has any problem at all with this restriction. They never did.
Update...
1. The Argyle school board has declined to renew Mr. Ceyanes' contract as superintendent of schools, because he chose to embarrass the community on a national level rather than admit his error with the dress code and make amends.
2. Argyle School District now has a social event dress code appropriate to social situations that is separate from the daytime classroom dress code. This code was initated by students and negotiated between student representatives and the principal of the high school.
3. "Freak dancing" is STILL FORBIDDEN AT ARGYLE SCHOOLS. No parent has any problem at all with this restriction. They never did.
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